"Fan Made: Bella's Womb from "Twilight" (aka creepiest "fan made" ever)
We've been writing these little Fan Made posts for awhile now, and although I'd like to think that I've seen just about everything you wacky fans can come up with, this little nugget of fandom came along and just about cost me my breakfast. Oh yes, one creative (and creepy) Twilight fan actually took the time to felt together Bella's womb, complete with -- wait for it -- an actual felted mutant fetus inside! Who in their right mind does stuff like this? Seriously, who wakes up one day and says, "Ya know, I think I want to spend the next week or so recreating what Bella's womb would look like with a mutant fetus inside, and then maybe share it with fans on the internet ... because they'll of course think I'm, like, completely normal and stuff."
Twilight fans, I think (or should I say, hope) you agree with me when I say we've discovered the limit. This is when you should turn to your child and say, "Mayyybe it's time to take on something a little more productive." Check out both the closed womb and the open womb w/ mutant fetus in the gallery below -- then tell us: Is this the creepiest piece of fan-created junk you've ever seen? If not, what beat this?
and if you don't know already what happens at the end of the book series...
Nessie Cullen is Bella and Edward's mutant hybrid spawn-of-Satan kid. It was nicknamed after the Loch Ness Monster, Bella's true love interest. Its full name is Renesmee Carlie Cullen and for entirely obvious and pertinent reasons that are relevant to the storyline, it has an extra chromosomal pair, making it a werewolf as well. According to the author of this shit storm, vampire + human = werewolf (see Munsters) because...FUCK YOU SCIENCE!.
Besides being really cute and having lots of pretty white teeth, Nessie also has the joy of growing super-fast; which is ironic since vampires aren't supposed to age, so it proves the author doesn't even know her own mythology. Its soon-to-be-husband Jacob Black only has to wait seven years to begin the banging.