If it's crap ... We'll tell you
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PaperyHornet posted a statusThe film opens with a shot of the Department of Customs raiding a shipping freighter and a character named Andy is forced to throw a package he was smuggling overboard so he does not get caught. When the people he was smuggling for find out, they kill his friend and put him in the hospital. Andy's sister Kate (Kate Beckinsale) is called to the hospital where her and husband Chris (Mark Wahlberg) are informed of the situation. It turns out that Chris used to be "the best in the business" at smuggling and must assemble a team to pull one last big job to pay off the debt and protect his family.
If you thought that description sounds boring, hold on it gets much worse from there on. The plot is a VERY by the numbers set up where an old pro has to come in for one last job, and that wouldn't usually matter as much is it was balanced out with a good script or some decent camerawork. Contraband delivers none of this, The dialogue is so bland and uninteresting it felt as if they writers were not even trying. This really comes to light when you hear any of the supposed gangsters interacting. As if the dialogue was written by someone who has only seen thugs via basic cable cop shows. What really got on my nerves above all else was whoever was holding the fucking camera during scenes where two characters had to have a conversation with each other. More than five times whenever there was an up close shot of someone's face the camera would slowly zoom into their face to a level that didn't make any sense! We don't need to see every little detail on their faces. Which wouldn't be much of a complaint if this film was shot with a better camera. If anything the zoom shots just help emphasize the shitty resolution the film really has. However whenever there is an action scene, the camera problems seem to magically go away. There is one scene is particular with a shoot-out in Panama that I fully enjoyed, but that was about it. The characters also seem to have this luck about them that helps them get away just seconds before the shit hits the fan. The concept is one you see in most action movies, but is used way to many times as a bullshit ploy to create tension that it just gets annoying by the end. Another thing that perplexed me was the R rating. There is barely anything that merits it relevant to the plot, and whenever anything does happen it just ends up feeling like they threw in a bunch of swear words and dumb scenes just to show a little blood.
Mark Wahlberg is an actor that I love to see in movies but in this he does nothing, just wading from scene to scene looking confused and angry. Even Kate Beckinsale couldn't calm the anger I felt walking out of the theater. Some Ole' Bullshit
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