Right. Since Ambassador Spock goes so good with eggnog, here's a recipe for my Evil Eggnog of Entropy.

Ingredients:
6 whole eggs
1 cup sugar
1 tablespoon vanilla extract
3/4 cup brandy or whisky (I prefer whisky, Jameson, to be specific)
1/3 cup dark rum (Captain Morgan, everyone!)
1 tablespoon fresh lemon juice
1 cup sour cream (or sweet cream if you prefer really sweet eggnog)
3 cups milk
Nutmeg to taste

First, pick a cannister in which you'd like to serve your eggnog. I always mix it in the jug I serve it in, but it is BIG and your dish should be of considerable size as well, as this recipe makes about 5 pints of eggnog.
All you need to make this is your mixer.
Beat the eggs for over 2 minutes untill they are nice and foamy.
Slowly add sugar and vanilla extract, mixing all through the process.
Add all the alcohol and lemon juice, still mixing.
Toss in the cream and milk, and mix for about 30 seconds.
Add nutmeg, as much as you fancy.
Mix for about a minute more so the eggnog will be foamy and fragrant and then put it in the refrigerator for about an hour.
Stir before serving.

Watch your family get drunk and dig skeletons out of the closets, like they do every Christmas.