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Music
Buy, Rent, or Skip: "Spaceballs Animated" and "The Green Berets"
SPACEBALLS - THE TOTALLY WARPED ADVENTURES ANIMATED
“What?” you exclaim, “No one told me about a Spaceballs animated series. Why I...probably wouldn’t watch it anyway.” And that would be a wise and discerning decision on your part. While the TV series was originally supposed to be 13 episodes to run on the video game channel, G4, they managed to crap out 4 half-assed flash animated episodes in 2008 before ceasing to discuss the matter any further. Until now.
The show, for those who HAVE to know more, was produced by Mel Brooks, with him returning to do the voices of the same characters he played in the original 1987 parody film. Also returning is Joan Rivers as C3P0 analogue, Dot Matrix (She’s still alive?!?) and Daphne Zuniga as Leia satire, Princess Vespa (She’s still relevant?!?). Oddly, Bill Pullman, Rick Moranis and the rest of the original cast chose to be uninvolved. Hmm.
The disc has four episodes, although strangely and perhaps tellingly, three of them are not the episodes that aired on TV back in 2008. They are titled “Outbreak”, “The Skroobinator”, “Deep Ship” and “Grand Theft Starship” and if these are this bad, I can’t even begin to imagine how terrible those not deemed worthy of inclusion must have been. Each episode centers around a pop culture parody, but none seem to remember the events of the original film or even parody the original source material, Star Wars. “Spaceballs” animated is irrelevant, unfunny (unless you like nothing but pun-based toilet humor) and unimaginative.
What happened to the Mel Brooks of old? I suspect he just got old. Credit where credit is due, but 83 year old men aren't usually the best guys to go to for jokes. It’s sad, but Mel should perhaps sit back and be content with what amazing works he left behind long ago. Certainly if this is what he considers to be funny these days, it’s time to quietly retire. I agree to pretend that this never happened if everyone else does! I don't think I have to tell you that you should SKIP this one, if you value your own sanity.
Click Here to Buy Spaceballs: The Totally Warped Animated Adventures
THE GREEN BERETS
I’m not the biggest John Wayne fan in the world, I’ll admit. He was an A-list actor with C-list talents whose masculinity clearly appealed to legions of men throughout the world nonetheless, the Arnold Schwarzenegger of his time. That being said, his range, such as it was, was just about enough for a lot of the terrific films he was cast in. I’m not sure “The Green Berets” was one of them, but time and the dying down of fiery opinions about the Vietnam war have done nothing but make this more enjoyable to watch. That and the sparkling clean Blu-Ray transfer.
The Duke plays Colonel Mike Kirby of the Green Beret Special Forces (and at sixty was unmistakably too old to be a soldier, but whatever), an experienced vet who is put in charge of putting in new defenses for a besieged outpost in the jungle (which here, is not so much looking anything like Vietnam, but the forests of Georgia where it was shot). Along for the ride is a skeptical newspaper reporter, George Beckworth (David Janssen), who is outspokenly against the war. He agrees to come along with Kirby to Vietnam to witness for himself what is going on over there to form a first-hand opinion of the situation. As John Wayne himself, staunch pro-American and anti-communist directed this film, you can imagine what the reporter’s final feelings about the war were in this story.
It’s not even mildly surprising how hard a lot of folk came down on this film for it’s simple minded outright bullshit about the war. To Wayne, it’s good versus evil because the United States of America says so, and that’s all you need to know. In truth, the Vietnam War was considerably more complicated and in terms of a reflection of that conflict, “The Green Berets” is insulting both to the soldiers in it and those who protested our involvement. However, as a campy John Wayne war flick, it’s actually fun. While pointing out the technical errors could become a drinking game in itself, there’s not much time for reflection. It’s a fast-moving fable that represents the ‘hawk’ mentality at it’s silliest. Lots of stuff blowing up and one-note charactatures dying left and right, with Wayne occasionally delivering priceless one-liners like “Out here, due process is with a bullet!”...yeah, I really COULD be describing an Arnold Schwarzeneggar film. For those who can enjoy films like this in the right way, "The Green Berets" is a solid RENT. Propaganda like this was offensive back in 1968, but now it’s an amusing look at a sort of single-minded, manipulative and dangerous blind patriotism that could never happen again. Right? Right?
Crap.
Click Here to Buy The Green Berets [Blu-ray]
Comment
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Comment by Patrick on January 28, 2010 at 6:55pm -
Didn't say you called him anything. I agreed with you about not being tactless. I do apologize if I worded things wrong though, it's often hard to convey a point via keyboard.
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Comment by Ash on January 28, 2010 at 5:39pm -
Spicus... racism, sexism, and paranoia existed since the beginning of the human species. and can in no way be called "Original American feelings". Every country has those things feelings, and with deeper histories of it.
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Comment by Ash on January 28, 2010 at 5:34pm
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hey Patrick, I never called Craig anything. my argument was don't name call, just have a real conversation and disprove the opposition with facts. Name calling is wrong. I think you misunderstood my post big time. all I pointed out is what Limbaugh and beck do.
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Comment by Patrick on January 28, 2010 at 11:17am
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A. Sadtler, yes, calling Craig a fucking moron would be utterly tactless.
Only people who you reach out to when you throw names in arguments are people who already agree with you. You alienate the opposition and make them not give a shit what you have to say. I won't listen to someone who says "Hey fuck-tard, you're a moron and I'm right, so listen", no one will listen if that's how you get your message out there, so there is no point to doing it unless you intend to never gain more people to your side.
Hell, if anything, Craig proved to me that the stereotype of a Beck/Limbaugh listener as a zealous, angry loon doesn't apply in his case. Craig didn't call anyone names, he simply stating his opinion, adding he isn't trying to be hostile or change people's beliefs.
Either way, I must mention that I hate spaceballs. I loved it as a kid, read this yesterday, and decided to dig around for it and pop it in... couldn't stand it anymore haha.
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Comment by Michael on January 28, 2010 at 10:07am -
I remember seeing 1, yes I said ONE commercial for the Spaceballs show and I watch G4TV quite a bit. For the past couple of years that channel has started losing its roots.
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Comment by Spicus mojificus on January 28, 2010 at 10:01am -
In Craig's defence racism, sexism and paranoia could be considered original American feelings... Rush is full of those feelings. I think Beck cries too much to represent old America but that's just my opinion.
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Comment by Ash on January 28, 2010 at 2:25am
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I think it's pretty amusing that Patrick said not to call Craig an "F-ing" moron for his defense of Limbaugh and Beck. When if anyone were to disagreed with Limbaugh or Beck on their shows that's exactly what those two men would call the opposing point of view holder.
P.S. Just because those two men are that tactless doesn't mean the people who oppose them should be. Just use facts to disprove anyone who thinks Limbaugh and Beck are smart. The two of them pretty much make up whatever comes out of their mouths. It just disgusts me that so many Americans take whatever they say as gospel and don't think for themselves or fact check what they say.
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Comment by Maxamus on January 28, 2010 at 1:17am -
You are right but I don't understand how people can be so easily manipulated by these morons. Yes, Glen Beck and Rush Limbaugh are morons and I'm not going to go through the reasons why. People need to see that these people are not worth listening too. I should not have been so aggressive but it does piss me off when people say that Beck and Limbaugh, "are the only big voices left in original American feelings." I think what pushed me to call him a retard is that he is saying this about two racists. And they are racists.
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Comment by Patrick on January 28, 2010 at 12:42am
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Don't bash Craig for an opinion... if you disagree with him it's your job to explain to him why and open discussion... not to call him a retard. What the fuck does that prove? This world is full of different opinions, and we only learn to respect each other through constructive argument. If I call you a fucking moron, or you call me a fucking moron, it just makes me not want to know your view that much more. That's my problem with pundits on the left AND the right! Nothing constructive... Sheeesh...
Personally, I agree, democrat or republican, it's politics as usual. Like I said, I am not anti-John Wayne, I was simply raised to dislike him, which is hard to shrug off... another time, another life, I might love him.
Either way, I agree things are becoming political to the point of stupid... personally, when it comes to wars, the only person's opinion who I give two shits worth are people who have served IN war and know what war is about... Not pundits crying (literally in Beck's case) on the television. That's my only point.
Either way, this is a movie site, not a political site, so I'm done with politics here.
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Comment by Maxamus on January 28, 2010 at 12:17am
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Hey Craig are fucking retarded. Glen Beck and Rush Limbaugh are dumb asses and you must be retarded if you actually listen to them. God it is scary that people actually listen to them.
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