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Movies I almost ended my life over... (Part 1).
This is a list of movies that have come of very recently and in the past that I have not only hated, but during which made me think. How would it feel to have a warm piece of steel in my skull? Feel free to disagree with me, or maybe even agree with me. But I have watched a ton of movies (hell I am watching one now) and so I feel I have maybe a very small right to rip these movies apart.
This list will start with some very recent releases and go back...
Eagle Eye
For starters, I knew this movie was going to be terrible even before I went. But I was out of town visiting my Father and he is attracted to only bad movies. Hell the last movie I saw with him was Death Race so you see my point. Every time I warn people at work not to see this movie they go, "Really I thought it looked good."
What part of this looked good? The fact is has Shia LaBeouf tipped me off right away. Since this asshole hasn't done a good movie since Disturbia and ruined Indiana Jones with his monkey swinging antics I have hated him with a passion.
Here are my underline issues with this piece of crap. The action is so over the top that you can never sit back and utter "This could happen in real life" I mean shit people there is a tunnel scene where Billy Bob and LaBeouf are driving away from an unmanned military plane. The only reason they stop running away is because the plane blows up a semi which crushes half their car. If that doesn't screen Die Hard 4 I don't know what does. The twist, if you can call it that, is the 2nd worst one this year. Indiana Jones takes the cake this year. So what do you have here? A 2 hr long movie that isn't suspenseful in the least bit, you never once think they will fail and useless action. Unless you are just a fan of the popcorn I warn anyone to not see this piece of crap.
College
I don't really have to say much about this movie other than their idea of college is the biggest fucking joke I have seen in a loooong time. Hell Sabrina the Teenage Witch did a better job. Just don't see this movie, look at the picture I included if you need more convincing.
Indiana Jones And the Crystal...you know which one I am talking about
Indiana Jones was the only trilogy that no one had a real solid complaint about. It was even a really easy formula to not fuck up. One part history lesson, two parts action. Bake, repeat. So why, why in the hell make this film. For anyone who still has yet to see this movie. Let me quickly give you this, Indiana Jones and Aliens. If that sounded like a kick ass idea to you...kill yourself. Because it ruins the entire flick. Even LaBeouf tries really hard to mess this up but the twist in this film will go down in movie history as the all time worst. I don't feel like this piece of crap deserves much more of my time explaining. Lets just say in short I am now confused at which movie torn my heart out and stomped on it worst: Star Wars Episode 1 or this piece of shit. I would vote for this movie.
Part 1 over...
Stay tuned for part 2.
This list will start with some very recent releases and go back...
Eagle Eye
For starters, I knew this movie was going to be terrible even before I went. But I was out of town visiting my Father and he is attracted to only bad movies. Hell the last movie I saw with him was Death Race so you see my point. Every time I warn people at work not to see this movie they go, "Really I thought it looked good."
What part of this looked good? The fact is has Shia LaBeouf tipped me off right away. Since this asshole hasn't done a good movie since Disturbia and ruined Indiana Jones with his monkey swinging antics I have hated him with a passion.
Here are my underline issues with this piece of crap. The action is so over the top that you can never sit back and utter "This could happen in real life" I mean shit people there is a tunnel scene where Billy Bob and LaBeouf are driving away from an unmanned military plane. The only reason they stop running away is because the plane blows up a semi which crushes half their car. If that doesn't screen Die Hard 4 I don't know what does. The twist, if you can call it that, is the 2nd worst one this year. Indiana Jones takes the cake this year. So what do you have here? A 2 hr long movie that isn't suspenseful in the least bit, you never once think they will fail and useless action. Unless you are just a fan of the popcorn I warn anyone to not see this piece of crap.
College
I don't really have to say much about this movie other than their idea of college is the biggest fucking joke I have seen in a loooong time. Hell Sabrina the Teenage Witch did a better job. Just don't see this movie, look at the picture I included if you need more convincing.
Indiana Jones And the Crystal...you know which one I am talking about
Indiana Jones was the only trilogy that no one had a real solid complaint about. It was even a really easy formula to not fuck up. One part history lesson, two parts action. Bake, repeat. So why, why in the hell make this film. For anyone who still has yet to see this movie. Let me quickly give you this, Indiana Jones and Aliens. If that sounded like a kick ass idea to you...kill yourself. Because it ruins the entire flick. Even LaBeouf tries really hard to mess this up but the twist in this film will go down in movie history as the all time worst. I don't feel like this piece of crap deserves much more of my time explaining. Lets just say in short I am now confused at which movie torn my heart out and stomped on it worst: Star Wars Episode 1 or this piece of shit. I would vote for this movie.
Part 1 over...
Stay tuned for part 2.
Comment
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Comment by Steven Smith on October 15, 2008 at 8:39am -
I have seen these movies. And I can honestly tell you Eagle Eye is trash. I am just giving people some solid points they themselves can judge whether or not they feel like sitting for two hours to watch one of the dumbest story lines in the world.
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Comment by Its all part of the plan on October 15, 2008 at 2:24am -
man, i hate stupid morons like u dude that judge a movie before even seen it and if u see it u gotta ruin it for everyone else,why in the fuck u gotta go telling people that they should not go see the movie maybe they will like it everybody has different tastes, and for that part that u say that the things that happened in the movie cannot be real, common is a fucking MOVIE 95% of the shit that happens in a movie is not real that's why they are called movies an not real life, i do agree with u about that piece of trash movie called college.
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Comment by Steven Smith on October 10, 2008 at 12:44am
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Caludia when I do to the movies I usually see two to three movies at a time. And that day I went to see Tropic Thunder but before it started I saw College. It was a huge mistake and I should have know it....I am sorry.
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Comment by Steven Smith on October 10, 2008 at 12:25am
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I Robot, no, not even in the least bit. Why design a robot thats walks a dog and can throw a car? And I did like 2001 Space Odyssey it tried new things and all of them worked. Eagle Eye tried nothing new and nothing work that they stole from other movies.
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Comment by Everwen on October 9, 2008 at 8:55pm -
I have a question, what the hell where you doing watching "College"?
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Comment by Brock on October 9, 2008 at 3:27pm -
Oh, so your like your movies grounded in realism. So I assume you didn't like 2001 Space Oddessy, or I Robot
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Comment by Steven Smith on October 9, 2008 at 7:28am
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Here's my main point to this. Eagle was crap because a computer should never be able to hold a child ransom for a favor. I mean AI can get pretty advanced but who would program a computer to be a terrorist? The entire concept was trash. If we keep letting these types of movies off the hook they will keep being made and my local theater will have 4 screens out of 14 dedicated to this terrible movie and won't get Ghost Town.
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Comment by Brock on October 9, 2008 at 5:48am
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Movies only cost 7 bucks where I live so, HA HA
Mindless Entertainment yet again can still be fun, I'm glad you enjoy great movies but not every movie can be perfect.
Granted the acting did get chessy in some points but I liked the plot to a point it is passible, whitch is why I'd rate it a Matinee.
I tend to switch my brain off in alot of movies, that way it makes the decent movies (Like Eagle Eye) fun and the really awsome movies (Like The Dark Knight) Mindblowing, all while crap ( Like 18 Fingers of Death [whitch really did make me wanna commit suicide]) remains crap.
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Comment by Steven Smith on October 8, 2008 at 6:05pm
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I don't enjoy mindless entertainment maybe you do. I enjoy great movies, not just so-so movies. Every time I go to the movies it cost me over $20 so excuse me if I want some decent acting and a story that doesn't make me groan from how stupid it is.
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Comment by Brock on October 8, 2008 at 4:42pm
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Yet again NO, Meet the Spartans and all the other crap are showcases of how not to make a movie.
I didn't consider the whole Eagle Eye being a super computer computer a "twist", a twist is something that hits you unexpectly, anyone could tell from the trailers what Eagle Eye really was. Just because it was predictible doesn't make it a bad movie. You can still have fun watching it, at least I did.
Honestly just beacuse you don't like 1 or 2 things in the movie doesn't mean you should hate it. The only thing your doing is nitpicking it to death, instead of enjoying it.
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