Creature From The Black Lagoon Review

Once more I decided to borrow another tape from my grandparents (I think they are getting kinda annoyed) because I actually did enjoy the last one. This time I picked one that I haven't seen before and since I heard they are making a remake of this film...I had to check out the original first. So this time it's: Creature From The Black Lagoon!

Again with the damn Narrator! Jesus what is the deal!? Well this time the Narrator only talks for about five minuets so it wasn't that frustrating. There were other things that were really annoying but I'll complain about that later on - let's get to the film.

I guess in the 50’s everyone was still amazed with dinosaurs and ancient civilizations because almost all of these films so far start out the same. A geology expedition in the Amazon uncovers fossilized evidence that links a land and sea animal in the form of a skeletal hand with webbed fingers. Dr. David Reed, a biologist persuades an institute's financial backer, Mark Williams, to fund an expedition back to the Amazon to look for the remainder of the skeleton.

When they arrive at Dr. Maia's (who discovered the fossilized skeleton earlier) camp they discover that his entire research team has been mysteriously killed. What is it with white people? Why do they stay when people are dead? If you think it’s fearless it’s not it’s plan ignorance. If I went somewhere and I saw a bunch of dead people, you better believe I’m going to run out of there. I don’t care if a Doctor tells me he thinks it was a Jaguar or not! I’m not staying in the Jungle with these damn crazy animals anyway.

"Yo fellas, I'm bringing home a drunk white b*tch!"
The excavation of the area where Maia found the hand turns up nothing. They are about to give up but then decided to search the Lagoon (thinking maybe the rest fell in some years ago) aka the "Black Lagoon," a paradise from which no one has ever returned alive. Is that going to stop them from making the greatest scientific find in history! - Nope. They dock and go under; this is when the film get's interesting. I didn't know they had the technology to shoot under water back in 1954 but I guess they did. We see two men swimming in almost nothing but oxygen takes on and a man following them in a lizard costume. For a second I thought the creature was going to jump out of the water and try to sell me car insurance.

They swim up empty handed and are contemplating leaving. Later, Kay goes swimming and is stalked underwater by Geico the Gecko, who then gets briefly caught in one of the ship's anchor, or fishnet, or something. Although it escapes, it leaves behind a claw in the net, revealing its existence to the scientists. To bait him out they start pouring epson salt into the Lagoon to make his muscles nice and relaxed so he can float up, ass first. The Creature comes out a few more times and stalks Kay and kills a fisher man before he is caught.

Later one of the scientist is flirting with Kay a little to agressivly and it must have made the Creature mad because he breaks free and starts attacking the man. The creature gets set on fire but escapes. Now it's time to kill that horny fish! This time it is not anti-climatic and actually got me kinda pumped. The whole fight scene is underwater (eat your heart out Waterworld) as Reed is trying to force the creature into the draglines so they can take it out of water and kill it! As they pull up the draglines, The creature comes up from behind and abducts Kay. It takes her to his under watery lair (which looks like the same lair in Phantom Of The Opera). David, Lucas, and Dr. Maia try and rescue Kay; ultimately she is saved and the beast shot. Riddled with bullets and stabbed in the heart with David's knife, the Gecko stumbles into the water and is last seen sinking into the depths of the Black Lagoon. The End..yeah they don't end these films very well.


Again Women are seen as sex objects in these films and it's abosolutely disgusting! I can't believe it - Kay was wearing a one piece bathing suit the whole time - what the hell! I mean...damn! The Creature looks really bad under water and above except for when it opens his mouth - that was actually visually very interesting. The acting is horrible especially the fight scenes, it's just ridiculous. I'm not going to hate on this film that much because if it wasn't for the Creature or Gill-Man then we wouldn't have had other monster films that followed. I actually hope that the remake is ten times better then this version and I can't see how it wont be. If you like these films give it a shot if not...stay away cause a webbed hand might crawl out of your toilet and stick it's hand...you get the picture!

Breck Eisner is set to direct the remake which is set for a 2009 release. Bill Paxton is rumored to star.