Soooo.... I saw Hellboy 2 about 2 weeks ago, and just FINALLY finished watching Hellboy 1. So, how odd was it that some crazy ass fbi agents found a little red demon baby with an unusually large rock hand off the coast of BFE? Hmmm....and how convenient is it that his girlfriend is Firestarter of the 21st century with a posh spice haircut? Well, at least he has nice muscles to keep her interest. I guess love truly is blind, because I couldn't look at his face for very long, but, hey, I live in Florida, and I can't look at most of the guys down here in the face for very long either, so maybe...Nah, Hellboy isn't from Orlando. So, yeah, I guess Hellboy would get alot of play in Florida. I digress. I really love Guillermo Del Toro's characters in these movies. He has one of the coolest imaginations of our time. I haven't seen such unique, and novel characters since movies like the Dark crystal, Legend, and the neverending Story, wait a minute, Did I say "novel" I'm having some flashbacks here....Suppose, suppose Hellboy is the love child of the horned beast from Legend, and suppose, just suppose that Rock figure that opened the gates to where the resting Golden Army lay dormant was the play cousin of the Rock man in the neverending story, and suppose, just suppose that old Abe was the gay lover of Fish Face from the Monster Squad (Abe has been around since 1863, remember...so, technically it could happen), and suppose, awww forget it, thats enough suppositions for tonight.
Anyway, did you know that Abe and Pan are played by the same actor, Doug James. Should've known he'd grow up to be strange. He has 2 first names. Anyway, I thought that was interesting. Again, I just love the characters. Its like having the absolute most beautiful and most hideous creatures from your most fairytale-like/hooked on acid/LSD dreams and nightmares come to the screen. Brilliant. Just brilliant. Honestly, the Hellboy plot sucks, because it's completely predictable, and the characters don't have that much depth, however, the visual imagery makes it all worth it. Does that subconsciously mean I would date a guy who is cute even if he is as dumb as a rock (hand) ? Ummm....nah. Any, again, I digress. Hellboy 2 and Pan's Labryinth were visually orgasmic. Thats the best way for me to describe it. I hope he continues creating such neat, new creatures. I love it!!!
Oh yeah...Hancock was great, except I think he got beat up for going to the movies with a white woman and that was never actually clarified, but I don't think blacks were even allowed to go in theaters back in those days, for real...so....besides that, I loved the special effects, the sarcastic comebacks, and the bittersweet tragic love story. Hmmm, more depth than Hellboy, but less visually stimulating.
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