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Music
The AFI Top 100 Movies... In 5 Words Each
Because the only way to truly enjoy cinema classics is to reduce them to hollow shells of what they used to be.
The rules are simple: 5 words each, no more, no less. Think of them as "movie captions."
Be forewarned, some SPOILERS lie ahead:
Rosebud is a sled. Surprise!
2) Casablanca (1942)
Great love story. Plus: Nazis!
A movie you can’t refuse.
4) Gone with the Wind (1939)
Boring and long. Liked intermission.
5) Lawrence of Arabia (1962)
Sausage fest in the desert.
Needs a little Pink Floyd.
7) The Graduate (1967)
Mrs. Robinson? I’d hit it.
8) On the Waterfront (1954)
Now this is a “contendah.”
Hard to watch. Bring tissues.
10) Singin' in the Rain (1952)
Dude sings in the rain.
So sweet I contemplated suicide.
12) Sunset Boulevard (1950)
Dark, gritty Hollywood self-wankery.
13) The Bridge on the River Kwai (1957)
War burns bridges. Get it?
If "it" means Marilyn Monroe.
15) Star Wars (1977)
Lucas eventually ruins this: “NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”
16) All About Eve (1950)
Extended catfight; clothes stay on.
17) The African Queen (1951)
Surprisingly, not a RuPaul biopic.
Encouraged me to stop showering.
19) Chinatown (1974)
Does not come with food.
20) One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest (1975)
Nicholson “pretends” to be crazy.
21) The Grapes of Wrath (1940)
The novel has more nudity.
Why isn’t anyone talking yet?
23) The Maltese Falcon (1941)
Badass guys smoke many cigarettes.
24) Raging Bull (1980)
De Niro’s fit, then fat.
A stranded alien is pedophilic.
26) Dr. Strangelove or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb (1964)
We are so fucking screwed.
27) Bonnie and Clyde (1967)
Hollywood, meet Sex and Violence.
Heart of Darkness, with napalm.
29) Mr. Smith Goes to Washington (1939)
Fiction with a capital “F.”
30) The Treasure of the Sierra Madre (1948)
Back then, Mexico seemed cool.
An hour-long panic attack.
32) The Godfather Part II (1974)
Advice: stop after this one.
33) High Noon (1952)
Newfound pacifist remembers killing’s cool.
34) To Kill a Mockingbird (1962)
Sparknotes or this? Can’t decide.
35) It Happened One Night (1934)
Hint: “it” doesn’t mean sex.
X rating disappoints: only boobs.
37) The Best Years of Our Lives (1946)
Mistreated vets: an American tradition.
38) Double Indemnity (1944)
Femme fatale deciphers insurance policies.
39) Doctor Zhivago (1965)
In USSR, movie censors you.
40) North by Northwest (1959)
Hitchcock makes a Bond film.
Gang violence becomes gang choreography.
42) Rear Window (1954)
Watch a guy watch guys.
Ape loves woman, ignores anatomy.
Holy shit, this is racist!
45) A Streetcar Named Desire (1951)
Turns out, chivalry is dead.
Future criminals talk like idiots.
47) Taxi Driver (1976)
Dude is driven insane. (Harhar)
48) Jaws (1975)
Good until you see Jaws.
1937: family film. 2008: fetish.
50) Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid (1969)
Newman and Redford: dream team.
51) The Philadelphia Story (1940)
Marry. Oops! Divorce. Oops! Remarry?
52) From Here to Eternity (1953)
Michael Bay, take some notes.
"Mozart” didn’t sound pretentious enough.
54) All Quiet on the Western Front (1930)
Except for a sniper. Shit.
55) The Sound of Music (1965)
Nazis hate on singing family.
A very long pilot episode.
57) The Third Man (1949)
AFI blooper! This film’s British.
58) Fantasia (1940)
Disney on an acid trip.
59) Rebel Without a Cause (1955)
Corrected: Emo Without a Cause
College professor bests Third Reich.
61) Vertigo (1958)
"Vertigo shot” introduces vomiting risk.
Dustin Hoffman at his sexiest.
63) Stagecoach (1939)
John Wayne is the man.
64) Close Encounters of the Third Kind (1977)
Aliens communicate using Casio keyboard.
Cannibal Hannibal manipulates darling Starling.
66) Network (1976)
“Television’s trashy!” – Pot, meet kettle.
67) The Manchurian Candidate (1962)
Communists develop mind control, magic.
68) An American in Paris (1951)
Locals deliberately give bad directions.
69) Shane (1953)
Badass gunslinger adopts pussy name.
They’re smuggling drugs, not croissants.
71) Forrest Gump (1994)
Being stupid looks like fun.
72) Ben-Hur (1959)
Fast and Furious: Coliseum Drift
73) Wuthering Heights (1939)
Fun for people with vaginas.
Is that Hitler performing slapstick?
75) Dances with Wolves (1990)
Indians struggle in pre-casino time.
76) City Lights (1931)
Missing sound hilariously pranks audience.
Lucas writes, directs…doesn’t suck?!
78) Rocky (1976)
Just this once: Stallone > Schwarzenegger
79) The Deer Hunter (1978)
Russian roulette, “in the shit.”
Blood everywhere. Bodies everywhere. Awesome.
81) Modern Times (1936)
Beware: silent movie; literacy required.
82) Giant (1956)
At 201 minutes, giant indeed.
Basically, Vietnam was fucked up.
84) Fargo (1996)
Hilarious. Literally everyone talks funny.
85) Duck Soup (1933)
Marx brothers wear identical moustaches.
86) Mutiny on the Bounty (1935)
MGM shits all over history.
Very scary, provided it’s 1931.
88) Easy Rider (1969)
Watch this one on drugs.
Patton gets high on war.
90) The Jazz Singer (1927)
Silent version: The Jazz Breather
91) My Fair Lady (1964)
Speech training makes woman tolerable.
92) A Place in the Sun (1951)
Winters, Taylor love triangle: Drool.
93) The Apartment (1960)
Dramedy. (Only needed one word.)
94? Are you shitting me?
95) Pulp Fiction (1994)
Cursing? Check. Violence? Check. Bible?...
96) The Searchers (1956)
Racist cowboys vs. racist Indians.
97) Bringing Up Baby (1938)
“Baby” is a leopard. WTF.
Eastwood ages, still kicks ass.
99) Guess Who's Coming to Dinner (1967)
A Yale-educated doctor! Except…
100) Yankee Doodle Dandy (1942)
This is actually a song.
*This is the original AFI list from 1998.
The rules are simple: 5 words each, no more, no less. Think of them as "movie captions."
Be forewarned, some SPOILERS lie ahead:
Rosebud is a sled. Surprise!
2) Casablanca (1942)
Great love story. Plus: Nazis!
A movie you can’t refuse.
4) Gone with the Wind (1939)
Boring and long. Liked intermission.
5) Lawrence of Arabia (1962)
Sausage fest in the desert.
Needs a little Pink Floyd.
7) The Graduate (1967)
Mrs. Robinson? I’d hit it.
8) On the Waterfront (1954)
Now this is a “contendah.”
Hard to watch. Bring tissues.
10) Singin' in the Rain (1952)
Dude sings in the rain.
So sweet I contemplated suicide.
12) Sunset Boulevard (1950)
Dark, gritty Hollywood self-wankery.
13) The Bridge on the River Kwai (1957)
War burns bridges. Get it?
If "it" means Marilyn Monroe.
15) Star Wars (1977)
Lucas eventually ruins this: “NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”
16) All About Eve (1950)
Extended catfight; clothes stay on.
17) The African Queen (1951)
Surprisingly, not a RuPaul biopic.
Encouraged me to stop showering.
19) Chinatown (1974)
Does not come with food.
20) One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest (1975)
Nicholson “pretends” to be crazy.
21) The Grapes of Wrath (1940)
The novel has more nudity.
Why isn’t anyone talking yet?
23) The Maltese Falcon (1941)
Badass guys smoke many cigarettes.
24) Raging Bull (1980)
De Niro’s fit, then fat.
A stranded alien is pedophilic.
26) Dr. Strangelove or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb (1964)
We are so fucking screwed.
27) Bonnie and Clyde (1967)
Hollywood, meet Sex and Violence.
Heart of Darkness, with napalm.
29) Mr. Smith Goes to Washington (1939)
Fiction with a capital “F.”
30) The Treasure of the Sierra Madre (1948)
Back then, Mexico seemed cool.
An hour-long panic attack.
32) The Godfather Part II (1974)
Advice: stop after this one.
33) High Noon (1952)
Newfound pacifist remembers killing’s cool.
34) To Kill a Mockingbird (1962)
Sparknotes or this? Can’t decide.
35) It Happened One Night (1934)
Hint: “it” doesn’t mean sex.
X rating disappoints: only boobs.
37) The Best Years of Our Lives (1946)
Mistreated vets: an American tradition.
38) Double Indemnity (1944)
Femme fatale deciphers insurance policies.
39) Doctor Zhivago (1965)
In USSR, movie censors you.
40) North by Northwest (1959)
Hitchcock makes a Bond film.
Gang violence becomes gang choreography.
42) Rear Window (1954)
Watch a guy watch guys.
Ape loves woman, ignores anatomy.
Holy shit, this is racist!
45) A Streetcar Named Desire (1951)
Turns out, chivalry is dead.
Future criminals talk like idiots.
47) Taxi Driver (1976)
Dude is driven insane. (Harhar)
48) Jaws (1975)
Good until you see Jaws.
1937: family film. 2008: fetish.
50) Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid (1969)
Newman and Redford: dream team.
51) The Philadelphia Story (1940)
Marry. Oops! Divorce. Oops! Remarry?
52) From Here to Eternity (1953)
Michael Bay, take some notes.
"Mozart” didn’t sound pretentious enough.
54) All Quiet on the Western Front (1930)
Except for a sniper. Shit.
55) The Sound of Music (1965)
Nazis hate on singing family.
A very long pilot episode.
57) The Third Man (1949)
AFI blooper! This film’s British.
58) Fantasia (1940)
Disney on an acid trip.
59) Rebel Without a Cause (1955)
Corrected: Emo Without a Cause
College professor bests Third Reich.
61) Vertigo (1958)
"Vertigo shot” introduces vomiting risk.
Dustin Hoffman at his sexiest.
63) Stagecoach (1939)
John Wayne is the man.
64) Close Encounters of the Third Kind (1977)
Aliens communicate using Casio keyboard.
Cannibal Hannibal manipulates darling Starling.
66) Network (1976)
“Television’s trashy!” – Pot, meet kettle.
67) The Manchurian Candidate (1962)
Communists develop mind control, magic.
68) An American in Paris (1951)
Locals deliberately give bad directions.
69) Shane (1953)
Badass gunslinger adopts pussy name.
They’re smuggling drugs, not croissants.
71) Forrest Gump (1994)
Being stupid looks like fun.
72) Ben-Hur (1959)
Fast and Furious: Coliseum Drift
73) Wuthering Heights (1939)
Fun for people with vaginas.
Is that Hitler performing slapstick?
75) Dances with Wolves (1990)
Indians struggle in pre-casino time.
76) City Lights (1931)
Missing sound hilariously pranks audience.
Lucas writes, directs…doesn’t suck?!
78) Rocky (1976)
Just this once: Stallone > Schwarzenegger
79) The Deer Hunter (1978)
Russian roulette, “in the shit.”
Blood everywhere. Bodies everywhere. Awesome.
81) Modern Times (1936)
Beware: silent movie; literacy required.
82) Giant (1956)
At 201 minutes, giant indeed.
Basically, Vietnam was fucked up.
84) Fargo (1996)
Hilarious. Literally everyone talks funny.
85) Duck Soup (1933)
Marx brothers wear identical moustaches.
86) Mutiny on the Bounty (1935)
MGM shits all over history.
Very scary, provided it’s 1931.
88) Easy Rider (1969)
Watch this one on drugs.
Patton gets high on war.
90) The Jazz Singer (1927)
Silent version: The Jazz Breather
91) My Fair Lady (1964)
Speech training makes woman tolerable.
92) A Place in the Sun (1951)
Winters, Taylor love triangle: Drool.
93) The Apartment (1960)
Dramedy. (Only needed one word.)
94? Are you shitting me?
95) Pulp Fiction (1994)
Cursing? Check. Violence? Check. Bible?...
96) The Searchers (1956)
Racist cowboys vs. racist Indians.
97) Bringing Up Baby (1938)
“Baby” is a leopard. WTF.
Eastwood ages, still kicks ass.
99) Guess Who's Coming to Dinner (1967)
A Yale-educated doctor! Except…
100) Yankee Doodle Dandy (1942)
This is actually a song.
*This is the original AFI list from 1998.
Views: 1200
Comment
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Comment by Russ on July 2, 2008 at 9:35am -
@ Rusty
me rent movie too, me also think work out great
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Comment by Manny S. on July 2, 2008 at 8:31am -
Yeah someone had mentioned a new list, and I think this it
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/AFI%27s_100_Years..._100_Movies_%2810th_Anniversary_Edition%29
This one looks pretty good too
http://www.afi.com/10top10/
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Comment by EdMuzick on July 2, 2008 at 7:56am -
Response to James - ease up guy. I believe that the "AFI 100" list was made in 1998 as a celebration of film's first hundred years. The American Film Institute is a pretty sharp bunch, and updates to this list are probably in the cards.
Go ahead and start your own thread - best movies of the past ten years - and make an case for inclusion of some of those movies into the AFI 100 (or an AFI 110 - film's been around for 110 years, after all).
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Comment by James on July 2, 2008 at 7:33am -
i cannot stand these best 100 movie lists. People pretend that there were only good movies in 'the good old days' it makes me sick. Lord of the Rings seems to be missing from that list. Anyone notice that? Titanic! Braveheart! Gandi! Chariots of Fire! Hello? Have I made my point?
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Comment by King Richard on July 1, 2008 at 9:31pm -
I didn't go to school so that I could count WTF as one word, damnit! Nice try, you fail!
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Staff Comment by Mandy Savage on July 1, 2008 at 7:47pm -
Wow...you're awesome man.
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Comment by EdMuzick on July 1, 2008 at 6:01pm
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Nice job Jared - very inventive.
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Comment by Rusty Shackelford on July 1, 2008 at 4:51pm -
I rent the movie to do a report on To kill a Mockingbird, work out great since I dont need to read at all
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Comment by Paul Mampilly on July 1, 2008 at 4:33pm -
@Jared,
It is a good website. I think you can do four words. It justs takes a litle bit of time that is all. You should try it.
Paul
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Comment by Beautiful Loser on July 1, 2008 at 4:11pm -
Great list , my favorite one is probably taxi driver
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