YOU HAVE REACHED THE EPICENTER...

as some sort of torture i was forced to endure a movie called "waitress" tonight. dont imagine many people have caught this indie gem, but let me give you a little advice if your planning on centering an evening around it. start off by lobotomizing yourself with a socket wrench and smoke enough bud to make your toes numb, this fucking thing is a bag of shit. Apparently since we always watch "guy" movies there is some unwritten law that we must occasionally sit still while a turd lingers in front… Continue

ive recently come to the realization that my dog is much smarter than the average human. For some this might be disturbing news, but as the owner of said pooch it has made me into some kind of twisted God to all of you. Bow plebes, bow. My new favorite movies all have to do with dogs that talk. White fang, Call of the Wild, Turner and Hooch...Turner talks, right? I forget. Anyhoo, I have to go shit on the carpet and rub my dogs nose in it, it's for your own good.

basically life can be broken into two categories, either you suck or you dont. if your not me you probably fall into the former. thats sad for you, but ive learned to live with it.

movies are essentially a waste of time and since you suck you probably waste a lot of time. i do too, but i dont suck. youll learn to appreciate the difference.

anyway, i can tell you more later but now i need to pee on a midget and jerk off my dog.