My Extremely Unnecessary Review of "Fred: The Movie"
Wow. Never have I seriousley ever wanted to shoot myself in the head. For those of you (and those of you who don't) know of You Tube sensation Fred played with increduousley annoying vigor by fellow Nebraska native Lucas Cruikshank) than be glad you don't. This kid, is doing what anyone would do to get famous, exploring child stereo types found most notably on home movies. Now I would have handed it to him, while I don't necessarily enjoy the Fred videos, but I kind of admire them for taking an idea and running with it, although Mr. Cruikshank has already proved he is ready to sell his soul for fame and writing credit, especially in the famous Fred bashers favorite video, where Lucas dances to Nobody's Perfect by Miley Cyrus, dressed in drag, not just with a girl, but with another guy friend of his! How the hell did he convince his friend to make that video. Face it, he's going yeah, You my Bitch, now, I've got this on you for Life. His videos have not only garnered a music deal, but slogans and T-Shirts. "Gammit!" "Hackin' Awesome!". Slogans that most of the You Tube generation know. But to follow the madness: Fred (who in the videos is a lonely six year old making videos with his boozy mother's camera) a deeply immature and annoying teenager, who has a crush on the cutest British accented girl in school, Judy (who is from the videos) and his ongoing feud with local teen singing soprano Kevin (also from the videos). Fred decides to venture out of his house and across town, to truly tell Judy how he feels, while running into pointless encounters and situations that wouldn't have even made sense to a doped up hippie. He's been promoting this film stating that he is proud his writing is getting him so much recognition... WHAT WRITING? Where in this story was there actually a character or situation that really meant a damn. If this is writing than the writers still must be on strike. On the whole, during my viewing of the film, I felt like I was slowly losing my mind and that I needed somrbody to do a reverse lobobtomy on me and help me get that hour and a half of my life back. The sad truth of the matter is, that time is gone and it's never coming back.
RATING: FUCK YOU!
Grant Marshall Gilbert's Blog
First off, Fuck You, Disney. You have brought happiness and the nostalgic childhood of most children since they were wee toddlers. From such cinematic achievements as the first ever full lenght animated feature Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs, to my personal childhood favorite Pinocchio, to other marvels such as Cinderella and Lady and the Tramp, to other rousing adventures such as The Jungle Book and 101 Dalmations, to everyone's favorites The Fox and The Hound and Oliver and Company, to… Continue
Posted on November 11, 2010 at 6:00pm — 3 Comments