If it's crap... We'll tell you
Thought's on Jennifer's Body.
Ever since the first trailer for this movie hit the internet a couple months back I thought two things after viewing it: 1. That this was going to be a terrible film, and 2. it's just going to be an excuse to get Megan Fox naked. In a way, I was right and wrong.
I was right in the fact that Jennifer's Body (written by Diablo Cody of Juno fame) is a pretty terrible film. Mostly because it fails to do the two things the trailers promised: To be a decent horror film, and to be a decent comedy.
It fails at being a horror film because: It isn't scary at all. Sure it has all the makings of a horror film (killer hunts down extremely stupid people, and kills them) but the problem is at no point in the the entirety of the film did I feel horrified or even remotely scared at what was going on. Even the death scenes (when Jennifer kills the boys) are completely lame. At no point in the entire film do we get to actually see Jennifer kill anyone. Whenever Jennifer attacks, the camera either cuts away or it shows Jennifer's and the victims shadow. Even the amount of gore and blood is pretty tame. Makes you wonder why this movie couldn't have simply been a pg-13 film.
It fails at being funny because: I would have forgave all of the problems of it being a shitty horror film if it was at least funny. Sadly it wasn't. As much as I enjoyed Juno, there were moments where I felt that it was trying way too hard to seem hip and witty. I get that same feeling watching Jennifer's Body, just only on a much bigger scale. Whether it's Jennifer trying to be shocking by talking like a guy, or characters making random pop culture references ("nice comeback, Hannah Montana") it's never funny.
It fails at exploiting Megan Fox: Remember when I said that in a way I was wrong about this film? Well this is why. At the very least I thought that the movie would have spent it's time exploiting the crap out of her body, but like I said before this movie is fucking tame. Not once is Megan Fox seen naked on camera. So for those hoping to get a glance at some Megan Fox titties, are going to be sadly disappointed.
I don't think I can recommend this movie to anyone. It's going to piss off Horror fans. It isn't funny, and those who are only watching it for Megan Fox are going to leave that theater disappointed.
I was right in the fact that Jennifer's Body (written by Diablo Cody of Juno fame) is a pretty terrible film. Mostly because it fails to do the two things the trailers promised: To be a decent horror film, and to be a decent comedy.
It fails at being a horror film because: It isn't scary at all. Sure it has all the makings of a horror film (killer hunts down extremely stupid people, and kills them) but the problem is at no point in the the entirety of the film did I feel horrified or even remotely scared at what was going on. Even the death scenes (when Jennifer kills the boys) are completely lame. At no point in the entire film do we get to actually see Jennifer kill anyone. Whenever Jennifer attacks, the camera either cuts away or it shows Jennifer's and the victims shadow. Even the amount of gore and blood is pretty tame. Makes you wonder why this movie couldn't have simply been a pg-13 film.
It fails at being funny because: I would have forgave all of the problems of it being a shitty horror film if it was at least funny. Sadly it wasn't. As much as I enjoyed Juno, there were moments where I felt that it was trying way too hard to seem hip and witty. I get that same feeling watching Jennifer's Body, just only on a much bigger scale. Whether it's Jennifer trying to be shocking by talking like a guy, or characters making random pop culture references ("nice comeback, Hannah Montana") it's never funny.
It fails at exploiting Megan Fox: Remember when I said that in a way I was wrong about this film? Well this is why. At the very least I thought that the movie would have spent it's time exploiting the crap out of her body, but like I said before this movie is fucking tame. Not once is Megan Fox seen naked on camera. So for those hoping to get a glance at some Megan Fox titties, are going to be sadly disappointed.
I don't think I can recommend this movie to anyone. It's going to piss off Horror fans. It isn't funny, and those who are only watching it for Megan Fox are going to leave that theater disappointed.
Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by Boatloads1017 on -
I had to see the movie for review purposes, but I went in with the lowest expectations. I left disappointed and when I came home, I was downright pissed. The worst part is good film stock was wasted to make this piece of shit when it could have been used to film something good, or at least decent.
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