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I think it's safe to say that we've all seen our fair share of terrible movies. In my experience, the movies that are truly soul-crushing are the ones that have greatness buried deep under a pile of fuckwittery. Just think for a moment; have you ever seen a movie with a great premise or visual style that was just DESTROYED by bad acting or a terrible script? These films always flash one thing in bright red lights: REMAKE. If a movie has interesting things about it, why NOT take those things and remake it into a better film? Do any of you have ideas for remakes of bad films? Ever been disappointed by a movie and then thought about ways that it could be improved? If so, LIST 'EM!

 

I'll start with the first one that comes to my mind:

 

Lady in the Water


I realize that this movie has a lot of fans, but I'm going to have to be blunt; I think this movie is awful. Not only is the story preposterous and filled with wooden characters, but it's infused with M Night Shyamalan's surprisingly large God complex. As the story gets more convoluted, the more Shyamalan asserts that he's a misunderstood genius that will one day revolutionize all of everything.

That being said, and not everyone will agree with this, I actually think that the core idea is incredibly interesting. When the film explains the mythology through an animation segment in the beginning, I was actually on board, and the idea of a creature from that mythology interacting with a human living in the modern-day is something I'd like to see explored. Plus, I actually like the cool, calm color-scheme of the film. Unfortunately, the movie builds on all of this in a way that's completely unnecessary and convoluted.

I think that someone should remake Lady in the Water, but only loosely. Streamline the mythology (change or get rid of arbitrary bullshit like the Guardian/healer/interpreter positions to make the story less clunky), give the human characters more depth, remove the pretentious messages, and make the movie a bit more down-to-Earth as a whole. With interesting visuals and good director who knows how to reign himself in, I think someone could turn this into a truly great, atmospheric fantasy film in the likeness of Let the Right One In.

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Fright Night...
Well, this thread is supposed to contain YOUR ideas for remakes of bad films, but that's an example, yes.
Mother of Tears
Explain?

Great book/s.  Horrible script. some horrible SFXs. Horrible costume design.  Horrible movie.  

 

 Need I say more?

 

Dune is too complex to do it justice in a 2-3 hour film, not to mention the material isn't exactly something that could be geared towards a young audience. It would be better to adapt it as a series like Game of Thrones.
actually, Sci-Fi did a Dune miniseries.  it was actually GOOD!  not mind blowing, but did justice to the novels.  i kinda dig the original movie, especially the director's cut, but it wasn't as true to Herbert's vision.  the miniseries sticks to it more.  you should check it out, i'd like to hear your opinion.

I've been meaning to check out that sci fi miniseries just never got around to it.

there were some things that I did actually like about the original, but overall I just couldn't get over the movie as a whole.  The script seemed to be pasted together with pages ripped straight out of the book.  alot of the dialogue was almost word for word the same as the book.

I agree though that dune is too complex for only one film.  you'd definitely need two movies to do it justice.  maybe even three if you really wanted to do a good job.

Event Horizon - great idea but they botched the execution. We just need some one who's really good at horror films to direct, and the script will have to be tweaked (a lot).

er, the studio ripped the guts out of Event Horizon. so seeing a complete print may change your mind, im not holding my breath though.

Hmm...

 

One of the most greatest generals and conquerors in history deserves a better fucking film than this.

Along this same train of thought, does anyone remember Caligula?

Instead of just making a porn movie, if someone wrote a god script and paired up with a good director, we could actually have a movie that provided a look at ancient Rome as well as the life and character of Caligula.

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